AUGUST 2011

Dear Various Customers at Various Jobs Over the Years,
1) I don't talk too fast: you hear too slowly.
2) Yes, I have indeed lived here all of my life.
Destroying the way you view your fellow southerners,
Heather
P.S. Learn to listen faster, 'kay? ♥

Me: Anything else for you today?
Customer: Not unless you want to get married.

C: Do you know Heather?
Me: What do you mean? Does she work here?
C: Yes.
Me: I'm the only Heather in the store.
C: Then you must be the one all the guys are talking about.

I honestly wish I was making these up.